I went to an event yesterday for work--it was a barbeque and I was able to wear something other than a suit. There were people there who I hadn't seen in a few years, people who I spent a lot of time with at one time. It was a lot of fun when I realized that quite a few people didn't recognize me and I had to introduce myself.
Even better was when the look of recognition and surprise hit their faces.
It was great motivation to keep on the path to losing the last 40!
After a long, frustrating hiatus, I'm back.
Today I weighed-in and celebrated 75-pounds lost. 75! That's a good-sized child.
It's been a long-time coming. Since June 2009, in fact. The first fifteen months the weight came off quickly, as though I was shedding a skin. A very thick, fat skin. One that weighed 62 pounds. It's taken me twelve more months to lose 13 additional pounds.
Considering I want to lose 35-40 more pounds I hope it won't take me four more years. I'll be an old woman by then!
What's working right now
Focusing on fruits and vegetables
Limiting carbs
Watching portion sizes
Having a non-tracking day every other Saturday
Limiting alcohol and sugar
Increasing my water intake
What I'm not working on
Exercise (I'm doing some, but not obsessing)
Measuring (I'm going mostly with the "core" plan)
It all sounds rather like a diet, doesn't it? But as I'm eating better, I'm feeling better.
And I can't tell you how good it felt to accept my 75-pound charm today!
Guess what? If you exercise more than you eat, you lose weight!
I have a new challenge to kick-start my weight-loss journey. Daily exercise. No more sitting on the couch, growing potatoes on my butt.
Those of you who follow my blog may have noticed that about a month ago the address changed to "GettingTo120.blogspot.com" as did my Twitter handle. It's a constant reminder for me that even though I've lost a huge amount of weight I have a long journey ahead of me. As of this morning I've lost 70 pounds; I have just 50 more to go.
Some significant changes in the past 14 months:
1) I started as a size 22/24, depending on the cut of the clothing item, etc. I'm now at a regular 16 in tops and dresses, a 16W in pants. Skirts...it depends. I *did* get a 16 regular bathing suit but realized after seeing a picture of me in it that it's still a bit too small.
2) Inches lost. I've lost lots of inches. Over ten inches from my hips, seven from my bust, and six from my waist.
3) Different approach to food. Sure--today I did seriously consider getting donuts this morning after my Weight Watchers meeting. I was even in line at the bakery. My dad's voice ran through my head "fat pills!" and when I looked at them, my mouth didn't water. They didn't look yummy. They looked like the equivalent of a whole big healthy brunch...but with a stomach ache and lethargy afterwards. So I left, thrilled that it was such a happy revelation, such a change in habit.
For lunch today I had a delicious summer salad made with organic Candy Cane Beets and Golden Beets from Shooting Star CSA--a great place I'm lucky to live near. This is earthy, sweet, and tangy. It is summer on a plate!
One cup cold, cooked beets, quartered
One medium orange, segmented
One thin slice of red onion...to taste
1 tsp balsamic vinegar (or to taste)
Salt
Combine the ingredients on a plate, and enjoy. Serves one as a lunch; serves two as a side.
I've only lost 12 pounds since the beginning of the year. Twelve pounds, that's great! You might say. Yes, it's nothing to sneeze at, I agree. And I'm pleased with those 12 pounds. But if I'd been truly working at it, it would have been more. And since I still have at least 43 more pounds to go, if I lose at the 12-pounds-in-six-months rate, it will be another two years. And I'd like to be done with the "figuring it out" portion in a year. Or less. Oh, by Thanksgiving would be lovely. And then just years and years of maintenance--a whole new journey.
One of the things I've been doing that has slowed me down is that I have not been cooking. WHAT? It's true. I have not been enthused about cooking lately. We've been doing a lot of Mexican take-away---shocking that I'm not losing lots of weight when I'm eating beans, rice and chile rellenos...huh?
Last night my husband brought me a sheet of paper and asked, "Why aren't I losing weight?" He'd written down all he'd eaten that day, all he'd drank. I figure that he should be eating about 40 points a day if he wants to lose weight. With the extra weekly points spread out through the week, he could have about 45 points, and still lose.
So how many points did he have yesterday? By my calculation, approximately 80. That's probably an average day for him. And the majority of it was consumed after 5pm. When I was around, and could be feeding him. Oh good god. I'm killing him by not cooking for him.
So I resolve to cook. I'll cook to save my life. I'll cook to save my husband's life.
It's been raining and stormy in Northern California this week, grounding my husband and I from our daily walks. It's been a convenient excuse to not exercise, and though I've done Jillian Michaels' 30-day Shred a number of the days, it just hasn't been the same.
Today I found a moment when the baby was asleep *and* the rain abated, so I threw on my heart-rate monitor watch and grabbed my hand weights and ran out the door. As I started up, my hip was sore and tight and my knee grumbled and I was tired. What was I doing? The baby was napping for another hour and I could use that time for something better--like reading my new books. Or figuring out what was for dinner. Or napping.
I pushed on. I thought about all the nice compliments I've received lately. I pictured my next goal--to hit 60 pounds lost. At the time when I normally turn up my street to head home, I kept going. I walked past the farm that's lush and green right now, and the hills past it were verdant and dappled in sunlight. Thinking about completing the Bay to Breakers, I kept going. Every time my heart rate dipped I reminded myself of the cocktail party I went to last night, where I ate and drank with abandon. By the end I logged 625 burned calories, and I was invigorated.
For the party I brought Cauliflower "Poppers" which are bite-sized pieces of cauliflower tossed with cumin, chili powder, salt, pepper and a touch of olive oil, then baked in the oven for 10 minutes. I *also* brought a fancy little appetizer that are super-easy to make. Amounts are flexible, depending on how many you want to make:
Caesar Salad Frico Bites
About 3 cups 4-cheese shredded Italian cheese mix--note: SHREDDED, not grated
1 to 1.5 shredded Parmesan or asiago cheese
Approx. 2 heads romaine lettuce
Garlic-herb croutons (you can make your own, but in the interest of time, you can certainly get store-bought)
Caesar dressing--again, make your own if you prefer, but I use Newman's Own Creamy Caesar dressing
Other materials: cookie sheet, non-stick aluminum foil, measuring cups, thin spatula
Pre-heat oven to 375 degrees. Mix cheeses together in a medium bowl. Line a cookie sheet with non-stick aluminum foil. Using a 1/8 measuring cup, put six rounded cupfuls of cheese on the foil. Gently tap down cheese. Cook for 7-8 minutes, watching for browning at the edges. When browned, use a thin spatula (like a fish spatula) to remove the cheese and insert it into 1/3 to 1/4 cup measuring cups. Be sure to get the cheese flat against the bottom so that your cups will sit properly. MOVE QUICKLY! If your cheese cools so that it isn't easily pliable, pop the tray into the oven for 30 seconds.
When the cheese has cooled in the measuring cups, remove to cool further on a rack. Use two cookie sheets to keep the process going.
Salad--crush the crutons by hand into a bowl (don't grind them in a food processor, it will pulverize them which you do not want). Chop the lettuce very fine and add to the crutons. Add enough dressing to season the salad, but you don't want it drippy. Season with crushed black pepper. There is probably enough salt in the cheese and crutons that you won't need to add more.
Spoon the salad into the cups and enjoy!
The cups can be made a day or two ahead of time.
Well, I'm still 1.6 pounds from 55 but yey, I lost!
Dinner tonight was slow cooker beef stew, beet & Chevre salad, and sourdough bread. Lovely feast!
There is a good chance that I might officially have lost 55 pounds tomorrow upon weigh-in. If so, that would mean that I made it through feasting season officially unscathed. (We didn't meet last week!)
I feel stuck. I'm so close to having lost 50 pounds. I don't seem to ever have enough time during the week to exercise during the week. I crave, oh, how I crave. I crave things I never used to really care about: cheesey Hawaiian pizza, chocolate mousse, quesadillas....I'm craving a lot of melted cheese. Other things too--fried chicken. Cookies. Macaroni salad. Stupid stuff. Food I didn't seek out when I ate anything I wanted--and anything I didn't want.
And in the end, I don't give into them. Not really. Well, sometimes I do. But I've been trying to stay in control. Because being out of control, and not caring about what I did to myself, is what got me in this state to begin with.
I used to wake up and think, "What am I going to eat today?!" with excitement. I'd watch cooking shows and cook with abandon. Though even I knew to stay away from Paula Deen.
Now, I wake up and I think, "What am I going to eat today?" with trepidation. Will I stay strong? Will I stay in control? Will I make wise, nutritious choices? Sometimes I don't, but many times I do.
It's not just about eating fattening foods. It's also about controlling portions. I like BIG food. When I moved to California I was introduced to the two-pounds taqueria burritos and never did I question the enormity of them. It was Fleagirl-sized food. No need for seconds.
Am I an overeater? Yes. Am I a compulsive overeater? Yes.
Chinese food is a "red light" food for me, meaning, if I start eating it, I won't stop. Deep fried meat covered in sweet, garlicky sauce? Pork fat and meat mingling with ginger and garlic, wrapped in pasta dough and pan-fried? Who would not eat a great potsticker put in front of them? Even green beans can be deep fried and still appear to look healthy.
On a completely different note, I'm about a pound or so away from hitting forty pounds lost. I'd gotten really close 10 days ago, then gained a bit (.8 lbs). Today I got on the scale to find I've gone up even more...so I need to get my nose back to the grindstone.
So why on earth would I make sweet & sour pork for dinner? Oh so many reasons. Because pork is a nice, sweet meat. Because I could. Because I wanted to take something really bad, and make it good. And I did.
Angelic Sweet & Sour Pork
2.5 lbs Pork Top Loin Roast, trimmed of fat
4 large red bell peppers (substitute up to one yellow or green)
1 large yellow onion
20-oz can pineapple chunks in sweetened juice
4 scallions, sliced in 1" pieces
Garlic powder
Dried ginger
Soy sauce
cider vinegar
1 Tbsp sugar
1 Tbsp ketchup
Red pepper flakes
Heat oven to 325; season pork with salt & pepper, cook in roasting pan, dry (no liquids, lid, etc), about 25 minutes a pound, until meat thermometer is about 143. Allow meat to rest, at which time thermometer will rise to 150-160 degrees.
While meat roasts, chop peppers and onions into large chunks. Heat pan on medium-high, add 2 tsps canola oil. When hot, add the onions. Stir fry until fragrant and still crisp. Remove (adding to roast pan is fine); add peppers to pan and stir fry, keeping crisp. Add a generous dash of garlic and ginger powders, and a liberal shake of soy sauce. Remove the peppers to the same pan as the onions. Add approximately three tablespoons of cider vinegar to pan, ketchup, sugar, and chili flakes, heat to boiling. Remove from heat, add pineapple with juices. Heat through. Add scallions.
Adjust sauce seasonings to taste, and salt onions & peppers. Toss with pineapple. Slice pork into generous slices (no wimpy thin pieces!) and serve.
Goes well with brown rice or quinoa.
So I tried to post a weight loss simulation of me losing 28.4 pounds, but all I could get to post was my "current" look. See below.
I don't know how accurate this is. I mean, it looks somewhat like my body, if I were a Barbie doll, with fully-molded vinyl and all that.
And my goal weight image? Well, that Fleagirl just looks anorexic. What's WRONG with her? No boobs, no curves. Considering I've been nothing but curves since I was ten, I can't picture that. It's got to be wrong.
Then again, I haven't been 143 since I was in 9th grade....
Did I mention I'm doing WW? I am. I'm doing it. I'm breathing, eating and living it. I'm losing for life, losing for good. I swear, I will be the Weight Watchers poster woman in a year. No one will recognize me, god knows, I won't recognize me.
I'm at -24lbs, and hope to hit -26 on Wednesday. Blow negative calories my way if you're reading this.
One of my problems has always been my love, my passion, for food. Good lord, I'm sitting here typing with a can of smoked oysters propped in front of my keyboard for no good reason! I've cooked a lot of yummy things in the past, usually things that could compete with Paula Deen or Two Fat Ladies for calories, if not pizazz.
The Bug's favorite dish that I make is Linguine and Clam Sauce. So I decided to trim it down, and make it work with my WW. Here's a recipe from 2006, lightened up, but true to it's roots:
Linguine and Clam Sauce--Healthy
Measure all amounts, adjust only pepper to your taste.
Since you'll cook the sauce on low heat, go ahead and use that non-stick saucepan.
Put lots of fresh water, dosed with kosher salt, onto boil.
When it boils, add and cook 10-16oz of Whole Grain linguine.
In the meantime:
My SBX drug of choice has been a Venti Non-Fat, No Whip, Caramel Mocha for a long time. I thought I was being pretty good. Non-fat milk. No deadly whipped cream. Just a couple of squirts of flavor....
Until I found out I was getting TEN quirts of sugared-flavor, which worked out to a whole lot of calories. At the same time, I was getting tall non-fat lattes for a co-worker. You know the kind. She's 23 and if she doesn't get to go running at least four times a week gets physically sick to her stomach. She's a size two, smart, and super sweet. Some times I want to throttle her.
Especially when she'd order her angelic latte each morning.
Well guess what? I'm wearing a coffee halo thanks to her! I started cutting back the squirts in January and by February was having the non-fat lattes. I do get grandes, simply because I like a second shot of espresso (I figure I have kids & a husband who keep me up at night and she can get 14 hours of beauty sleep if she wants to).
I really do enjoy the non-fat lattes. And that's something I NEVER imagined I'd say. In fact, I'm going to bed RIGHT NOW so I can wake up and have one in the morning!
Weighed in today, holding my breath, hoping our silly Wii was right when I told me my weight.
Yup.
I lost 5.8 pounds this week.
For all you diet and Weight Watcher naysayers who say the big losses are in the first three weeks and that it's all water weight...well, I'm in week eleven.
What worked this week? Measuring & tracking what I ate. Planning what to eat. And a teeny bit of exercise.
We had a lot of multigrain pasta with veggies and chicken this week. But we ALSO had NY Strip Steak this week...and MAN was it delicious!
15+ lbs gone, it's working well.
Last night I made a mango/jicama/black bean salad after seeing Daisy Martinez make it on Viva Daisy. It was the first time I prepared a jicama, and cut myself peeling it, and then didn't know how far down the "thin, fibrous layer" went that the Joy of Cooking told me to peel away.
It was okay--though next time I'll add two mangoes and cut the jicama into smaller pieces. And I'll probably add more cilantro and maybe a bit of cumin.
Well, folks, I'm back in the game. This past spring I took a vacation from all the things I normally enjoy: knitting, cooking, writing. I've been reading a lot, and getting a lot of take-out, and nursing a sore knee.
But all of that's changed.
I bought a bathing suit that I swear used to be my mother's. It's black and it has a skirt, and I look like I should be 60 years old wearing it. But I wore it, and actually got into the pool with in-laws--which I've never done before. Of course, my sister in-law who is 16 years older than me and in her mid-fifties was wearing the cutest red and white polka dot bikini...and looked smoking hot.
So I'm back at Weight Watchers (but losing slowly...only 8 pounds so far). I'm walking. I'm cooking again (tonight we'll have grilled chicken, brown rice, and asian broccoli). And I'm starting a pair of socks for Juiceboy today.
The plums from the farmer's market are in the icebox and are just as William Carlos Williams says...juicy and delicious. But the nectarines and peaches are on the counter to ripen warmly in the summer sun.
I might not be ready for a cute new bathing suit this summer, but as soon as I hit a certain milestone, I'm getting myself a polka dotted one!
I've had it. That's it. I'm done. I'm fed up with being fat. Diets never seem to work (I lost 55 pounds and found it again, rather quickly).
So, I've started changing the way I look at food. And to change my habits, I'm...changing my habits, week by week. Here's what I've done so far:
Week 1: Stopped consuming sugar.
Well, cut down drastically. No more ice cream (light or not), no more Christmas candy, etc. Also, have cut my Venti Non-fat, no-whip Caramel Mocha down (360 cals, 61g of sugar) to a grande non-fat, no-whip, two-pump mocha (180 cals, 22g of sugar).
Week 2: Stopped consuming alcohol.
Okay, no alcohol the first week, but I did enjoy two glasses of red last night with Top Chef.
Week 3: No take out.
This is a big one. Lots of times when I'm coming home from work I'll swing past the Hawaiian take-out or the giant burrito place. No more. And I'm trying very hard to bring my lunch to work, as well.
I haven't decided what Week 4 will bring, but I think it might be salad with every dinner or fruit with every meal.
I haven't weighed myself. I'll do that when I start to notice a change in how my clothes are fitting. I *will* take my measurements. Okay, back to work.
I've been wondering lately how people without much money are handling the rise in...everything. The rising price of gas, of milk, of bread, of cereal, of rice, of bell peppers, of onions even. It seems my food costs have gone up about 20% in the past six months. I've been crabbing and kvetching...but no more.
Last night I threw away a produce drawer full of food. A drawer...you know the one I mean, the one at the bottom of my fridge. I'd gone to the Farmers' Market two Fridays in a row. And bought way too much stuff. Even I knew that at the time. And then I went to Whole Foods. And then I went to WinCo. And after that I did my necessity trips to Safeway for milk and baby food and red wine (which are much cheaper than at other stores...).
In the end, produce never got eaten. It was as though everyone was overwhelmed by the bounty, and when they opened the fridge just thought, Oh. There's nothing in here to eat because I just see a forest of food.
Too bad there aren't any trees.
And so, when the trees began to smell, I finally tossed them.
I made a new rule yesterday. The cupboards and fridge can only be 1/3 full at any given time. I'll do the disaster stash someplace else. I think we don't force ourselves to eat what we have. From now on, I only replenish when we're absolutely empty.
Today for lunch I made carrot soup with all the carrots that made it out of the forest. They were still needing to be eaten, and I had bags and bags of them in baby version, sliced, and shredded (remember, the Bug has two false front teeth and can't bite into his favorite veggie). So I browned some red onion, two cloves of garlic, and a whole mess of carrots with salt, pepper, and a little curry powder. Then I threw in a box of generic chicken broth, a little extra water, and simmered till they were soft. I blended it with an immersion blender (a fantastic baby present!), added about two cups of shredded carrots, let it reduce another 15 minutes, and gave a quick whir again.
After adjusting seasonings, we enjoyed it topped with some plain yogurt left over from our Greek dinner. The Bug, the Baby and I all quite liked it (the Bug and I added more curry powder and I added some red pepper flakes), and then I fed it to my mother-in-law when she arrived mid-afternoon. She wasn't sure about the yogurt, until she had it. I'm pretty sure she enjoyed it, too.
I wouldn't have made it today...had I not seen the carrots waiting patiently. I probably would have just opted for a quick canned soup. I'm glad I saw them!
Okay. Quick post as I'm supposed to be at work, pushing paper around my desk. As I prepped The Baby's bottle at 2:32am I realized Blackbird is right. I hate my blog. I don't like the design; the dark background; the fact that it looks the same as everyone else who Bloggers. I looked at my photos and realize I'll never win awards, and seriously, I need to stop letting The Bug take the pictures...or at least I need to clean up the plates before the pictures are taken.
And I need to get back on my diet. I don't know when I fell off it, but I've been eating like Paula Deen cooks. I have five kinds of cheese in my fridge, three kinds of butter, and at least four items that have pork in them. I am bursting out of my clothes and will look the same in my bathing suit this summer as I did last...when I was pregnant.
I must stop dreaming of visions of pork fat and think spring: farmers' markets, local produce, and fresh fresh fresh!
An item in today's news warns that not only workers in buttery-flavored microwave popcorn plants can be injured from exposure to the fumes of fake butter. Consumers can too:
Huh. The piggie consumed several bags of extra butter flavored microwave popcorn EVERY DAY FOR SEVERAL YEARS--and his doctor is worried about his shortness of breath? Doesn't she know that when you weigh 87 Trillion Pounds you might have a slight problem breathing?
"...the ailing patient... consumed "several bags of extra butter flavored microwave popcorn" every day for several years.He described progressively worsening respiratory symptoms of coughing and shortness of breath. Tests found his ability to exhale was deteriorating ...although his condition seemed to stabilize after he quit using microwave popcorn."
